We love a good old-fashioned Irish mammy. Packing the lunch for work, roast dinner waiting on arrival home and ironing everything down to the socks – no pressure to live up to then!
But, when it comes to your offspring planning the wedding of their dreams with their partner, it is time to take a gracious step back.
It’s totally understandable to be overjoyed about the biggest day of their lives, but there are a few laws you should abide by in order to avoid conflict during the run-up.
We’re sure your future daughter or son-in-law will include you in various ways and stages throughout the process, so it’s important to tread that fine line between being helpful and allowing them to enjoy putting their own stamp on their wedding.
Do Not Start An Argument Over Petty Details
If it is not going to matter in five years time, then don’t worry about it now. Complaining about minor details will cast a negative atmosphere around the big day. If you don’t approve of the choice of mass readings or the layout of the tables isn’t to your taste, best to keep schtum.
There Is No Need For 1,526 Questions
It’s great to offer suggestions and a helping hand. But, asking needless questions and interrogating their choices will just create tension between everyone. If the couple has decided on a certain theme or venue, trust their judgement and accept their decisions. Be mindful, it is not your wedding!
Never Wear White
It is an age-old tradition that only the bride-to-be wears white. So, this is the number one rule you should NEVER break. It will look like you are trying to steal her limelight. However, it is okay to wear white if requested by the bride. A growing trend over the last year has seen many bridal parties going all-white on the day, making your choice of colour perfectly acceptable.
Don’t Try To Outdo The Other Mother
Instigating an imaginary competitive war with the other mother won’t win you any friends. Of course, you will want to do your best and utmost to make everyone happy and throw the best celebration known to man. Remember, there’s room for everyone to be involved in the journey and shine in their own unique way.
Consult About The Dress Code
As a courtesy, it is wise to ask the bride-to-be what colour her mother and bridesmaids will be wearing on the day. This way you can begin shopping and avoid purchasing a similar shade.
Ask First Before Inviting Your Friends
Obviously you will be excited and want to shout from the rooftops that a date has been set. Before you root out your megaphone and announce the details to your pals, ask about the guest list numbers. Maybe the happy couple might prefer a more intimate and meaningful ceremony with just family, or maybe due to budget constraints they can’t afford a large wedding.
Don’t Assume You Are Invited To The Hen
While it would be lovely to join in the banter with your future daughter-in-law, in some cases many brides and grooms-to-be don’t invite parents to their hen or stag party. Best to wait until she brings it up in conversation to avoid putting unnecessary pressure on the situation.
Image Credit: Michelle Gardella Photography via Emmaline Bride.